Day ONE of the Skinny Biatch Diet

day one- day one- how I hate thee.

So, I don't need to technically do this skinny biatch diet. But I like it because it challenges me and insults me at the same time. The authors call you names like moron and then other choice words and it makes you want to beat them by accomplishing it.

It's the classic you can't do this... so you try with all your might to do it.

Basically the Skinny Biatch diet is vegan. As a steak, chicken and Fish lover I find this intresting. I grew up on a farm and I remember not being tall enough to brush my own teeth and learning that animals scream before being slaughtered. My DAD who is amazing, decided that his family would eat (for a season of our lives) off his farm which was green before green became cool and was holistic before it became obvious that is what is needed for balance.

I literally have memories of seeing baby goats get born, homeless people clothed and fed and ready... eating my pet pig for breakfast. So, in and around being a vegatarian and vegan i have feelings. needless to say the information in this book is compelling and horrible, truth and just not what you want to hear. It is almost as bad as when I found out the main ingredient in my beloved corn chowder was whispers...cellulite.

Day One- I felt scared about eating so many carbs. What do these fools mean I can eat as much bread as I want?

I really wanted bacon when I woke up. I think it is because these FOOLS told me not to have it.

After my morning yoga- I made jokes about the pig being a magicial tasty animal that i wanted to eat, NOW.

I skipped sugar in my coffee- stupid rules and I ate some poweder nonsense that didn't resemble the old school one and one I got addicted to being a new englander.

screw slendaaaaaaarrr... it makes me feel fake. I would rather have the breathe of an 80 year old man in the country that try the fake sugar.

This is how my day went. I am not hungry on this diet. I feel like some kind of mad nomad running around eating grains, vegtables and dirt.

If I gain weight from the carbs, I might get a pet pig and name him some sort of name that shows adoration towards tasty meats that keep you skinny.

Little best selling diet and skinny biatch book, please don't disaapoinment me. I don't feel any skinnier....

please don't sit on a web of lies... skinny biatch authors.

I wonder if I sneak in some of my cupcakes what will happen?