birthdate week epiphany, 32.

32. here.i.go.


i woke up with the kind of hangover that should be banned to Mexico. i don't know entirely what got into me and why at 10 o'clock at night i was at my home doing handstands on my head and re-thinking my birth date epiphanies... but i was. i know why i was re-thinking, because one of my best friends, the sweetest woman challenged me to take a huge professional chance... what this looks like.. .yet to be determined but it will look vastly different from what is going down right now.





it's been a hard couple years for me, to be honest, and this is NO knock at all on anything, but last born date my mom was in M.G.H and the one before- the condition was so hard out that my birthday was just a reminder that i was alive. literally.





this born date was like I'm ALIVE so much alive and full of strength and joy that i can and will do yoga poses after taking out a few martinis and a bottle plus of wine and rethink how to kill it professionally and what goals i will nail down and put out for 32. i have stuck to this practice, since i found out about goal setting at 13.. .but the only poor bastards that had to hear about it


my parents


my best friends. . .





now you can hear about, laugh about, even maybe think about some fun for yourselves.





2011. 32. goal one. ride a giraffe in Africa.





more than anything i want to ride a giraffe into the sunset- i would even settle for the sunrise. i actually have a strong desire for this. . . i would ride an ostrich too, same idea, same notion, same dream -area. I actually like the ostrich and hate them at the same time. like i want to punch one in the face and hug it in one motion. not sure what is going on there. the giraffe, the open safari, the sun... this is something I need to figure to do before the year is up.





on a more serious note, my heart has wanted to go to Africa and safari.


i watch the shows.


i try to learn the noises.


for some strange reason i can identify most poisonous snakes (oh there is a story there)


* why i can identify snakes?*


Henry Scarano. one man. one mark. one mission. he was epic like chris carb's name of a dashboard confessional album before dashboard even became dashboard.





if you don't know, now you know. My father- had this how to teach his kids not to have any fear mantra when i was growing up.


VA beach-back country-dirtbike tracks *home of my uncle*my father's brother.


this man is a national-fighter- a marine and taught after the service, the marines, how to fight this was how he landed in norfolk, va. we won't get into the deets...





this is my beloved uncle. a man i spent a summer trying to be like at 29 and a childhood admiring... a man who could crush you with his love, and pick you up with his pinky.





my cousin won all sorts of awards on dirtbikes, big time racer as a kid. so when we would visit the cousins at VA beach we would always hit the tracks. how did we get to the homemade one you ask? ps i couldn't of been past my daddy's hip when i was riding a dirt bike and learning about snakes.


Daddy:" Christina to get to the race track you have to get thru this area."


Christina: "ok, daddy. is there something wrong with this area. the dogs won't go near it."


mind you we were staring at some wood damp area.


Daddy:" do you hear the noise?"


Christina: "yes, daddy, sort of sounds like crickets."


Daddy: " no Christina, those are cottonmouths maybe,(oh the maybe was so REASSURING) cooperheads and rattlesnakes. we aren't in the yard at home anymore, it's different here. just run really fast and be very light on your feet. I will be right next to you."


Christina "ok, daddy, tell me when to go"


so, that may of had something to do with it. you know what else- may of...



this little spring.





Alligator Point, Tallahassee, Florida.


my mother's beloved sister lived here. we would visit often.


Henry the Fish.


Wakula Springs, Florida.





a few words on that one.





this is a place, where you would swim not an arms length away from alligators and jump off what appeared to be the size of a New York City Sky scraper to someone so small.



I spent my summers knowing this place well, I even knew which board was my fav. to jump off of, for the most air.


when you approached the beach the sign said, "no small children or dogs allowed"





so, my parents would take us here, so we could take a swim and we loved it.





I think the Boat tour and the Fish named Henry was the best thing I ever saw.


having a gingerale on a small boat and looking at an alligator swim under the glass paddle boat and being taught it was no big deal- is something i think every child should experience...





why? because when HUGE scary things happen, little 5'3 adults can stand up for what is right, even if it may cost them everything.


after jumping off the high jump:





Christina: " daddy, the water is warm, but something tickles my legs on the way up"


Daddy: "oh, those are just the water snakes"


Christina:" will they bite me?"


Daddy: "no, they won't bother you unless you bother them."


Christina: "it feels like i might be bothering them, they swim up with me."


Daddy: "oh, you would know if one bites you. you would get very sick, fast and do not be afraid, i am right here, i would suck the bad out."


Christina: "like how you suck the bee poison out when i get stung?" (I am allergic to bees)


Daddy: "yes. christina. just like that."











2011. 32. goal two. speak a new language.


i am going to take a class. to learn a new language. i already know what the language is.


details to come on this one...





may you all be covered in love today and find maybe a little adventure... this year too.





xo, christina

Dream Big- Bucket List Revisited

As life goes, I manage to not blog as much as I promise, I forget the sugar in the coffee and I always have some sort of hilarious adventure along with a touch of beautiful irony and fun.

My father mentioned the Blog this weekend and if you know me all that amazing person has to do is sneeze and I am at the store buying Kleenex... so... let's look at the Bucket list for 2011.

BUCKET LIST-2011 and counting

sigh.. now I have some new adventures to work on for 2011...

1. get into the best possible shape- I want it to be so I can be beaten down in a knife fight and still survive, get into a scuffle with a shark and come out victorious... you know the type of concerns you can run into... on the day to day.




2. take ownership of a wreckless abandon to the things that move me. for example, fun, laughter, banishing fear, being kind, giving to others, dancing when no one is watching, friendships, adventuring around in the mundane and the extra-oridnary... living a life of love. at the end of all of this, that will be the one thing friends and family could say... is that "she loved".




3. drink snake blood in thailand.




4. stop getting tattoos, maybe?




5. drive a mini cooper in europe. (Why didn't I think of that when it was right there!)




6. ride a cow in mykonos (i have seen them and been up close but never thought to ride one until just now=regret)




7. go to ireland and sing pub songs in irish pubs and run thru the rolling green hills.




8. publish and finish.




9. ride train (s) across the U.S.A




10. drive a race car.




11. learn the lesson from my parents- that loving like today is the last day is the only way to live. until i saw this romance- i had no idea WHAT wreckless abandon to love looked like- they are an amazing couple, real soulmates.




12. ride in a hot air ballon




13. maybe sign up for cupcake wars



14. go to a hot spring.



15. stop wishing that vampire slayer was/is a real job.



16. de-tach from my iphone for an hour a day, everyday not including sleepy time.

A burger, A Tree and a conversation with my mom

Yesterday between a touch of a self-induced head ache ;) and a long weekend of fun activities I went to get that little rascal to take her to her fav pub. We decided we would get burgers and fries. We both had on our skully hats and grins... I from the night before and her, who knows what she was up too. If you know my mom she is always up to something hilarious.

We got into a conversation about Christmas trees. I talked about the smell of the real tree in my home when I woke up in the morning and she said- I know that smell. It has been so long since I had a real tree, I may like one this year. I told her I would take her- to get one. She told me that a real tree was what she used to do when she was poor. When she made a little money she bought a fake tree. She said it took a long time for her to be able to buy a fake tree. She told me about all the trees she had... As I was sitting there I realized that in this women, who was born in 1938 there were stories that could make anyone cry or laugh. Her appreciation of being able to buy a fake tree blew me over. She said- When you have nothing and then you have something- you can really appreicaite it. I kept thinking about the book tuesdays with morrie. How a conversation could make your heart explode. Everyone talks about revelation and divine wisdom and being better and I was being run over by truth in a pub, with a skully hat and a hangover and through those little blue eyes that are always up to something, I was having a moment of clarity- a moment- that was simple " when you have nothing and then you have something you can really know you have something..." she was appreciating a fake tree, when most would complain about putting up a tree she was happy that she was able to afford one " one day"

You want to change your mindset? Try swallowing that- the humilitiy that came out of her floored me. I saw my mom in a rare moment share- something- that you can't get in books. She told me 'every great accomplishment is at first seen as impossible and when you have nothing- when you get something it's awesome.' I told her she was awesome.

When we went to pay the check, I noticed she was counting her cash- and she said- always give your best- I won't disclose the amount she tipped- but it was more than generous.

The Bartender and the Manager came over to say hi to her, wish her a happy thanksgiving and they knew all about me, about my job my cupcakes- and noting my parents come in a few times a week and how much they loved my parents. I began to tear up when i realized this beautiful person- is literally adored by everyoone she comes in contact with.

We left the pub and she said "take me by the trees and if I feel inspired we will get one" I took her by the trees and I will never forgot her little bright eyes- she said " that one christina, that's the one" So I illegally parked the mini van in a fire lane and I ran into walmart- I started to tear up like a little kid- and I said to this guy with a face full of tears " My Mom found the tree she wanted- could you please help me get it for her?" I mean I was a hot mess, the good hot mess. He said of course- and when he saw my mom's sparkly eyes- he was moved- and was humbled- we walked back in with the tag for the tree- didn't speak, but he was smiling...and I could tell he didn't want to charge me-

When he rang the tree, he said " no, that was marked as twenty- your not paying full price" and he said to me " your mom is pretty awesome" So I kept from hugging him and thanked him.

When I got back to the car, my mom said " this is so awesome." I said, it really is.

She smiled the whole way back to her house-

I haven't stopped smiling. Joy can be contagious, humility can change the outcome.

I had a burger at a Pub with my mom but I felt like I was at the ritz having a filet with the Queen of England.

Christina's Fun Finds

Being the best female I can be I found these things/ideas to be awesome

1. maybelline the colossal volume express mascara (yellow container) available @CVS is the same quality or dare I say better than- my Dior and chanel and bad-girl lash by benefit mascara and you will save SO much $. so do it. you will be happy. Run- way lashes for cheap.
2. a really cook chic I know Rachael owns this shop- rasberry beret one is in wakefield and the other is in cambridge- I have found two gucci bags- vintage- I can't say enough about her awesomeness and the fun little treasures you can find here. I have attached the website.
3. I found a GORGEOUS new color that I have never used which was odd when I went for my mother/daughter mani/pedi date it is OPI We'll always have Paris. This color is perfect for the fall and the winter- go check it out- you will like it.
4. the new *laugh if you want too* Hillary Duff Scent With love- that I happened to by mistake stumble across in tjmaxx near my office is maybe 14$ and it smells like a cross between my classic (staple) Christian Dior addict and some kind of sweet- cookie- smell. I have gotten almost as many "what are you wearing, christina ?" this week as I usually do when I am wearing my DIOR. this amazing scent is almost 100$ cheaper- and the scent literally is close enough in quality. You will feel good about the price and smell awesome.
5. when i was attempting vegan ism- I came across a chocolate powder sweet thing to the face, like a kiss but goes into your belly. Maxwell House International Mocha & French Vanilla Latte are just as good as your fav coffee house and you can enjoy it at home. It reminded me of being in europe.
6. I found and awesome recipe for vegetable fajitas on allrecipes.com and it goes awesome with Sav. blanc wine or from real house wives the "skinny" margarita. you can get this at any liquor store and it is so so good. Impress someone with your ability to make Vegetable Fajitas- :)

I am done with the Skinny Biatch book- closing thoughts

You don't need to read the book- I will tell you right now- what you need to do.

1. ban all sugar and artificial sweeteners ( i part-own a cupcake company, not possible :() Splenda and any other fakies stimulate your sweet tooth and real sugar well I am not telling you because Sugar is awesome. They say you can have fruit when your sweet tooth kicks in. They suggest yucky alternatives to baked goods like beet sugar and cane juice and syrups. (no, no, no! I am a Mary Poppins gen- a spoon full of sugar- helps the medicine go down, whether it is the hardships of life or the cough syrup. Ain't nothing like being a girl and putting on a cute apron and baking in the kitchen! just sayin' and you should add in some HOT shoes while doing this- it really creates the cuteness of being a female....
2. eat brown rice, that's reasonable brown rice is awesome. Eat whole wheat pasta- already do- always.
3. Become a vegetarian. Well, That is reasonable.
4. Eats tons of Vegatables, Check. Vegatables are amazing.
5. Change your Dairy to soy. I have done that- not hard- soy is actually really yummy.
6. Eat alot of Soy, Veggies, Nuts, water, green tea and Fruits.
7. They call everything a slip up, including wine and martinis. I just don't think I could be the girl that I am without these two. :) They do say you can have "organic" wine- It tastes to me like those weird drinks that are think with all the viatimins in them. so, that's not going to happen.

In yoga this morning- I decided- It was a great read- I learned alot- There are some lifestyle changes I put into immediate effect.

But I can't live with out certain things. I think in conclusion- I might choose be a vegatarian that eats fish which is called a Pescetarian. So skinny biatch is worth the read if you want knowledge and to be FORCED make lifestyle choices. But being a Vegan is way to extreme for my laid back nature, but what an honorable lifestyle.... :)

the weekend as a vegan comes to an end.

it is so interesting to me how one area of your life can flourish like with business and success and new ideas and new challenges and an entire different area is treated with an un needed dose of apathy and the cup tips right over. it always and still is amazing me how people can claim to care for you but at the first test of this they show you a whole different ball game- and then they serve you with an indifference that just makes no sense. everyone you talk to after a surprising fall out I am sure could sing the same tune - shocking. I on the other hand tread very careful around how I treat people. I always take into consideration the other's heart.
I will never not do that, despite how I am treated. my life is evidence of that. i believe how you treat others shouldn't be swayed even if someone is being not as you would desire. I think it takes more dignity to be kind in the face of this than to turn to two wrongs. yes, it still hurts the same whether you cut someone down back or you don't. I say don't inflict hurt on them, even if they are hurting you. There is enough hurt in the world- try not to create excess if you can. enough on my moral thoughts from the weekend.

With that being said... I spent the entire weekend, catching up on helping my heart along and making cupcakes... helping the homeless and teaching first and second graders. I did the typical spend time with family, cry and then of course clean and shop. I have managed to organize everything that I own and sort FINALLY a large amount of clothes for women in need and then of course organize every article I have into three wonderful closets and two shoe closets. This week I start pushing very hard with the cupcake company and I have some other big things on my plate that I am looking forward too. I am catching up on my power point skills and getting ready to nail some huge things....


How did the skinny biatch diet go today? well, I lost my appetite completely so I didnt really need to stick to much of anything.

I am sure I will wake up hungry- until then- I am sticking to the skinny biatch vegan diet by not being hungry. I had a pomegranate fruit- so I won the skinny biatch book today-

Christina 1. skinny biatch book zero.




I hope all my friends and family had a better weekend than me and of course a better day than the beloved pats.

Day TWO of the skinny biatch and the "vegan" attempt

so.. today I woke up.. after an epiphany to grow a back bone, thank you kim and I had a craving for cookies. In the skinny biatch diet you can't have cookies. So i went to the cafe at my office building and looked for the cereal with the little cookies. I had already decided I wouldnt have a real cookie- I would have the fakies. I did not as you can guess find the cookie breakfast cereal I wanted i instead went for cinn. toast crunch with no fat milk. I didn't do what the book said, clearly but the milk loaded with sugar was worth it. I went the entire rainy friday with... coffee and powdered nonsense and for lunch I ate veggies and peanuts. By dinner I was bored and ate a salad and left over french fries (which i don't want to talk about those)

I went to a clothing swap and one of my friends who follows my blog had sent me a text " i have something for your skinny biatch efforts when you get here" and she did... when I got there beautfiful clothes were spread all over the house and she said " take whatever you want, all the girls are done" I found things to add to my closet that I had only dreamed of. Coats, shoes, pants- everything I saw resembled Mod and Preppy and of course romantic elements. I was in heaven. Then she said " for your efforts I have Vodka and Pelligrino"

Needless to say- day two I cheated on the milk and sugar covered cereal- But managed to stay MOSTLY to the skinny biatch diet. I haven't lost weight- But my body is reacting.
I feel random bursts of energy. I can't tell if this is because I have had much needed rest- or if it is because I am following these crazy health nut guidelines. Luckly I have not gotten to the section on alcohol. My guess is that my wine night is out and my martini affair may be called into question. I am pretty sure I am not going to like that chapter.

That is all for now, but early in the morning I head to New Hampshire. I am making more cupcakes than you would believe. My sister who is one of my heroes (all of my sisters are really) is a long time vegetarian. She will be excited to hear all about my new "vegan-like- with cookies and alcohol adventure" maybe she will send me home with some killer reciepes and I won't feel like such a dead beat. She has a way to make me feel like a sophisticated female-

My friend who is a very talented Visual artist will be in the Muppet Cupcake Factory with us for the day- and she will be shooting us for her portfolio. I am just so blessed to have so many talented and amazing people in my life... maybe I will make a cupcake in honor of this bastard book and upload a photo to my blog...

If I don't get skinny- I want my penny back that I paid for this book. Plus the 2.85$ in shipping and handling from amazon.

On an end note:
Skinny Biatch- you shouldn't take cookies away from anyone. No animals were harmed in the baking of cookies- try a life balance. My Dog eats cookies and loves them. I think the animals don't mind? But thanks for telling me what processed sugar can do to body- I could of done with out that information. But now that I have it... I am marked for life with the haunting thought.

I personally enjoy sugar highs and sugar crashes all in a day at the office. It brings a little excitement to the mundane.

Day three should be fun- I will be covered in a sea of sugar making things that taste sweet- all day long. Muppet cupcakes does not use egg- being sensitive to the vegetarian and health- reasons... but we certainly use sugar... because sugar is the best and makes everything a little bit nicer.

Till day three... and I am not hungry I am just so thirsty because I am eating awkward things like peanuts. It almosts makes you not want to eat. They are too salty. I may be what my mom likes to call "bastardizing" this skinny biatch diet... o well, I am trying something new and hard.